A Blade....In the Dark Pg 16

I was up and across the room, spell in one hand, dagger in the other, before the echoes of the scream died. Signar was up with a sword in his hand, both of us looking around for a reason. We heard voices from the room across the hall from mine. I dissipated the spell and put the dagger on the dresser and grabbed the linen shirt that Signar had worn the day before, it hung to my knees. Signar was putting on pants, then he walked out of the bedroom door and across the hall to see what was wrong, I was right behind him.

We heard our regular guard talking to a female guard, it seems she was assigned here and he had been moved to Rorikstead where he had family that could put him up. A misunderstanding had put them both in the same bed and she wasn't happy about it. It seemed Tex was back and sleeping in the room downstairs, so she thought to use the smaller room.

Signar went down to answer the knock at the door, I was right behind him, as I figured the guard would want to see me before they would leave us be. As Signar explained to the guard what was wrong, I peeked from behind his back at the guard, he laughed and said have a good rest of the night.

I grabbed a jug of fruit juice and some breakfast rolls and headed upstairs,  I stopped long enough to put on some loose pants and then took everything out to the balcony. I knew Signar would join me once the issue with the guards was taken care of.

I heard our bedroom door close so knew he would be out in a minute,  which he was, with a clean shirt on. He sat down and propped his feet up on the lower balcony rail. We sat in silence, for a while and I got to think some of my problems through. I was enjoying the quiet chill of the morning, the sun wasn't even a glow on the horizon yet, an aurora was putting on a dim show.

"My Lady? You're not going to eat that are you?" I paused with one of the pastries almost to my lips and looked at it, then grimaced... ick... sausage roll, Hulda made them for Signar and Tex, I much preferred the fruit pastries, but it appeared that I had already eaten all of those. I put it down and Signar laughed then picked it up and popped it in his mouth. I picked up my mug and took a sip.

"I've finished my armor, so I think we will head over to Riverwood and see what Delphine wants. Even though it's only a day's ride, I think a couple days' travel rations and the tents might be a good idea. "

"You have in mind to go somewhere after seeing Delphine?"

"I don't really know, I doubt she said urgent and just wants our company. I would prefer to be prepared. Plus we might go to Windhelm, the court wizard there is pretty old and may have an answer to why my magic is so much less than it was before." This worried me more than some of the other problems, as I relied on my magic in battle. I would be careful, not just because I hated the feeling of being weak and flat on my back, but because Signar and Tex also relied on my magics.

I stood up and walked to the door, looking back over my shoulder I told Signar that it was going to be dark for a couple hours yet and the bed did look rather inviting.

The trip to Riverwood was rather uneventful, the guards having finally gotten rid of the wolf pack that had been attacking travelers. Another would move in to take their place, but today at least the way was clear. Orgnar greeted me,  with a grin which was for him as good as a smile and a hug, and asked if I was going to sing and teach Sven a couple new songs. Seems he was playing the same couple of melancholy song's over and over again.

I laughed and said no I was here to speak with Delphine. The Lady herself choose that moment to come up out of the cellar. She motioned for me to follow her then went to shut her bedroom door once we were inside.  Signar closed the door, she looked at me then at him, and frowned.

"Where I go he goes", at which I got growled at, " Correction, where I go they go."

"Fine, follow me down, so that no one can overhear".  I gave Signar that 'see I told you look', he just shrugged. The only person in the Inn at that time was Ognar.

"So, I heard you are Dragonborn, is that correct?"

" One of the Guards at the Western Watchtower named me so after defeating the dragon that was attacking there. The Jarl agreed when I told him I had absorbed some kind of power from the Dragon when he died. The Greybeards named me so after several tests."  She snorted and looked back down at the table.

"You'll forgive me if I don't believe everything the Greybeards say, to be true".

"Your prerogative of course. So,  what.. you want to follow me around until a dragon attacks and then help me slay it so that I can absorb it's soul upon its death?"  when Signar shifted from his apparently relaxed position, I looked and saw the angry expression on his face. "Peace Signar."

"No, I know where one might be resurrecting if the pattern holds. You gave me the key to that pattern."

"The Dragonstone?" She nodded, "Why so much interest in dragons and Dragonborns?"

" I'm a member of the Blades," I startled when she said that, but quickly thought it figured, " We remember what few other people do. The Blades started as Dragonslayers and The Dragonborn is the ultimate dragonslayer, by absorbing it's soul, they won't come back. Which is what is happening now, something is bringing the dragons back to life."

"So where are we heading?"

"Kynesgrove, if the pattern holds that is where the next dragon will be resurrected at". I nodded

"Fine then let's get going"

We got to Kynesgrove three days later, Delphine didn't have a horse and wouldn't let us buy her one. If one discounts bandit attacks, wild animals, crappy weather, and un-social companion, it was a pleasant trip. We arrived in time to meet a woman running from the town saying that a dragon was attacking, but after questioning her, it seems it had just flown over towards the dragon mound.

We raced up the hill, for once Tex was not the first one there. The others crouched behind a rock, but I didn't bother, what point when the Black dragon knew I was there. I did not catch all the words that he said to the dragon mound, but another dragon crawled out of the dust and dirt, bones at first then flesh and skin. He gave his name to the Black Dragon, Alduin, firstborn of Akatosh.

The others did not catch the name, though when I looked at Tex, he was hugging so close to the boulder, that it looked like he was trying to be part of it. I frowned at him, it wasn't like he was scared, more like he didn't want to be seen.

I looked back when Alduin started speaking again, he was looking right at me, but speaking in the Dragon language, so I didn't understand most of it. He started berating me for calling myself Dovah and not knowing how to speak the language. I snorted, I never called myself dragon, everyone else was, but I said not a word, it didn't really matter. He gave another mighty flap to his wings and told the other dragon to "kill her".

"OK, guy's and gal's, fights on...kill the dragons". I used my staff to summon and got a Winged Twilight and then summoned my bound bow. My first two shots were for Alduin, but he didn't even flinch in his flight, which did not bode well for killing him when next we met.

It wasn't as long a fight as I had thought it would be, but Sahloknir was not as strong as he would have thought either. He did say we were putting up a good fight, for mortals. When he crash-landed and Signar went to do battle with his sword in hand, he even said that mortals had become arrogant while he slept. When Tex came into view I thought he was going to say something to the hound, but Signar put his sword through the underside of his throat at the moment.

Delphine came up to me right after I absorbed Sahlokir's soul, as his memories became mine, I felt the loneliness of one who called himself Sky's Phantom Hunter, never to be seen, by any, prey or friend, Alduin had been the only one who ever managed to find him.

"So, it is true, you can absorb a dragon's soul. I owe you answers. We have been looking for a purpose, for well, since we failed in our job to protect Uriel Septim VII. With the return of the dragons, I think I have found our purpose. That black dragon, he was resurrecting the other, we need to find out who is behind that." I snorted and she looked at me sharply.

" I saw him in Helgen," laughing weakly I continued, " You could say he saved my life."

She started going on about Ulfirc and The Empire and Thalmor, conspiracies and while I thought that the Thalmor might be a good source of information, I knew they were not conspiring with Alduin, let alone controlling him. But I didn't need to divulge all my secrets to her, so I kept my mouth shut.

"That's all good and well Delphine, but exactly how would we get the information from the Thalmor?"

" I don't know, I just don't know... damn, we are stumbling around in the dark. I have a couple of ideas, meet me back in Riverwood, it'll be a couple days to a week, I need to get in touch with some contacts". With that, she went back down the road.

I watched her go and then walked over to the dragon mound and sat on its edge. I stared brooding at Sahlokir's bones for a couple minutes, watching Signar and Tex walk around the field. Ulfric, he had a court wizard, an older man if I remembered what Ralof had said correctly. I didn't know him, but most wizards welcome a trade in magical items and as all I wanted was some information, he might be open to the idea.

When Signar started walking back to me, I got up and motioned in the direction of Kynesgrove. I told him that I wanted to speak with Ulfric's court wizard, he frowned a bit and scratched his chin, but shrugged and said fine, we could head to Windhelm, it was very close, only made sense to stop there for the night.

When we neared the Windhelm stables, my sight went blurry and I saw his face and Azura's... as I got dizzier, I saw the two of us standing in the snow on a road. I sighed and shouted "fine I'll go" in my head. My sight restored, the dizziness passed, I turned my horse up the road that would lead us to The Nightgate Inn and a Dunmer that I hoped would have some answers.

"Change of plans, I need to go meet a man".

~~~~~~
She was coming, I packed my things and got the Inn Keeper to fill another pack with food. I had already arranged to rent his grandfather's hunting cabin, had checked it out, and put some other supplies in it.  I sat down to some hot stew and then went out to the road to wait for her.

Learning to Live...again pg 15

I arranged for Maurice, the pilgrim, to meet us at the stable at the crack of dawn. As Signar and I left the house a courier stopped me and handed me another letter,  saying I was one popular woman to get so many letters. I opened the note and blinked, wondering why Delphine would be sending me a letter that said she needed to see me urgently. I handed the note to Signar and asked what he thought, he shook his head and said he was pretty clueless on that account too.

He asked if we were going to go there, I shook my head but said, yes, but not till after we take care of the tree for Danica. We put our packs on the horses, along with the camping gear, it would take a few days to get to Darkwater Crossing. Tex took the lead and Signar trailed at the end, leading the horses.

After the second pack of wolves attacked us and Maurice looked unhappy at their deaths, I started using a calming spell on the animals that decided to attack. Thankfully there were no large packs and I could handle the creatures one or two at a time. We made it to Darkwater Crossing late the next afternoon, right in time to help the guards with a dragon that was attacking.

My magic's near exhausted, from the last fight with a bear and her cubs, I used my staff to summon a deadra and got lucky with the Golden Saint that answered. She pulled her bow and let arrows fly, I was not far behind her with a summoned bow. Maurice and Tex were both under a rocky overhang, which was a good thing as this dragon was spitting fire.

It was a long and arduous fight, but when the dragon finally crashed onto the ground behind the Inn, Signar and the guards had it dispatched before I could get there. I did absorb the soul of the dragon and might have felt slightly sorry for the creature if he had not attacked us.

We helped with putting out the fires, even Tex carried buckets of water for people to throw on the burning thatch. My one and only attempt at using magic to put out the fire, a snowstorm spell, worked but had me flat on my back with a bleeding nose that let me know I had overextended myself.  I lay there on the ground with Tex watching over me, until Signar came and picked me up, to carry me to the tent that he had just pitched.

He knelt down on my bedroll but did not set me down completely. "My Lady, I".. I did not let him finish but placed the fingers of the hand not holding the bloody rag to my nose, against his lips.

This time he kissed my fingers and then pulled my hand away, looking down into my eyes.

"My Lady, memories are only what you make of them and for you, they are almost all that you have. I might end up a bitter-sweet memory in your next life, but it is a memory that you would have. Would you trade the memories of the love you and Martin shared for no memory at all? " I felt my heart contract, to not have those memories, to not have the deep friendship, the love, even the pain of losing him, I could not imagine. He must have seen something in my eye's for he continued.

"I too would have memories, My Lady, I would not for all the pain that came later, have wished not to know my wife. The day I found her broken body, my heart was ripped from my chest. But I would not change a minute of the time we had,  those memories of her in happier times. As much as the thought of losing you pains me and I know it will come sooner or later,  once your task is done. I already cherish the memories of our time together. If you have no feelings for me other than those of friendship, I can understand and I will live with  that, but if you find your feelings run as deep as mine, then do not hide them."

I turned my cheek against the cold plate steel of his armor, it felt good against my overheated skin. I raised my hand back up to his face, this time running my fingers along his jawline, a week's growth of beard tickling my fingertips.  I tipped my head back up so that I could look into his eyes again. I felt ridiculous holding the bloody rag to my nose and trying to have a serious conversation.

He shifted both of us to a more comfortable position, he sitting propped up against a saddle, me with my back against his upraised leg, my side against his chest.. I was not even holding my own head up really, I felt weak as a newborn.  He put his hand over mine and turned his head to kiss the palm of my hand, my heart melted and I parted my lips to speak when.

There was a disturbance at the tent entrance and Tex walked in, followed by a "Are you decent?" from Maurice. He and a woman walked into the tent. " I thought you might need a healer, so when the worst of the injured were taken care of I brought her here."

The woman walked over and knelt next to the two of us. "You overextended your magic?" at my nod she continued, " Your head is pounding, eyes won't focus, feel weak and boneless?" I again nodded and she dug into her bag. "Ok, I'm going to use a small healing spell that will help with the pounding in your head and make up a tea that will help with everything else. You won't be up and around today, maybe not even tomorrow, but your nose will stop bleeding and you can heal over a couple of days. If you gentlemen would go outside, fetch some hot water, I will get the Lady cleaned up and into something more comfortable than charred leathers. "   Signar got up and gently laid me back against the saddle that he had been propped upon.

He said he would be right back with some hot water, though I am not sure where he had planned on getting it from. He was back fairly quickly and had a kettle that was steaming and a bucket that sloshed when he bent to come through the tent opening. Maurice did not come back in with him, nor as it happens did Tex. He looked at the healer and told her he would be right outside if she needed any help and with that grabbed a pack and left the tent.

After using the spell, the Healer waited a moment or two and then took the bloody rag from my nose. She tipped my head toward the light, I winced but didn't turn my head away. She nodded to herself and said that the bleeding had stopped and was the thumping going away? I nodded yes again and she bustled about fixing the tea. She asked which was my pack and then picked mine as if my name was written on it. Before she opened it, she brought it over and placed it on the ground where I would see what she was doing.

She helped me clean up, well really she bathed me like I was an infant, I could barely move my own body. Then dressed me in a loose shift that I generally wore under another dress. She tsk'd and got the tea and helped me down part of it. She covered me with a blanket and then called for Signar to come back in.

He walked through the opening and looked at me quickly then back at her. I lay there with my eyes closed, listening to the directions she was giving him. I felt a complete fool, all those calming spells when I would have been much better off, using a bow. I sure wouldn't be in this predicament. I opened my eyes and watched him walk around the tent, without the heavy plate steal, he had the grace of a large cat stalking its prey. He came over and settled on the ground next to me, staring at me with brooding eyes.

I tried lifting my hand so that I could grab his, I wanted to tell him how I felt. My hand barely fluttered and I made an effort to move my legs and found that I could not. I started panicking, had the healer given me a poison that I could not move, I knew I was weak, but I had never been this weak before. I made a strangled sound in my throat and Signar must have seen the panicked expression on my face because he picked me back up and held me tight in his arms.

"Shh My Lady, the healer said that the tea she gave you would relax your body and make you more umm woozy. I won't let anything happen to you."  He tucked my head under his chin and covered us with a blanket. His hand rubbing my back in a soothing way, I allowed myself to drift with the medicines that she had given me, into a dreamless sleep.


The next morning I woke, feeling the rise and fall of Signar's chest, hearing his steady breathing, the slow steady beat of his heart. I lay there relaxed, thinking about what I would say to him. He was right, the only things I really had are my memories and my necklace. But how did I really feel about him, was it love or just need. I heaved a sigh and then felt my pillow rumble with laughter.

"Deep thoughts My Lady?" I looked up at his laughing blue eyes and felt whimsy take me.

"Oh I was just wondering how my bed would feel as a blanket, I mean it's awfully warm but rather hard and lumpy". He blinked, then a wide smile split his face, as he moved the hand that had been holding mine on his chest to the center of my back. The next thing I knew I was staring up into his eye's as I lay flat on my back.

"Lumpy huh?" He lowered his face to mine until his nose was touching mine, I knew most of his weight was resting on his arms and knees, but he was much heavier than I had thought. "So, do I make a good blanket?"

I tipped my head slightly so that our lips met and said, " No, you're too damn heavy".  He deepened the kiss for a moment and then levered himself up and stood beside our makeshift bed.

"Drink your tea and get some more rest, Maurice and I are going to help make repairs to the village" He turned to walk away, then stopped, " We will speak later, My Lady". With that, he ducked out of the tent.

I picked up the tea that was next to my bed and took a sip... gah! The stuff was even nastier cold.  Nothing for it though, I took a huge breath then downed it all in one gulp, then stuffed a couple of the snowberries that had been left on a plate into my mouth, biting into them one by one till they covered the flavor of the tea.

I lay there staring at the top of the tent, I wasn't particularly thinking of anything, just letting my thoughts drift. I never could make good decisions when drinking or taking medications, so other than letting the thoughts flit through my head and looking at them, I didn't make any choices that I might regret later.

Two days later we were on our way to the Eldergleam, Signar insisted I ride and not fight if something showed up. I grimaced but knew he was right, I still didn't have the strength. It was very odd, I had never overused my magic in this way before.

It was a beautiful cavern with waterfalls and the tree inside outlined by the rays of the sun coming through holes in the roof of the cavern.  Many pilgrims were sitting in various places around. I could feel how special this place was, and why the followers of Kynareth found it holy. I asked Maurice if there wasn't a better way than using a profane weapon on a Holy symbol to a Divine to help the tree back in Whiterun.

He managed to get the Eldergleam to give us a new sapling to replace the tree. I thought this was a much better idea and thanked him. We headed back to Whiterun that day. I was deep in thought most of the day, unfortunately probably not on the topic most on Signar's mind. It was important of course, to both of us, but I was troubled by the thought that my magic seemed to be weaker than it used to be in the past.

When we got to Whiterun I paid the stableman to care for the horses and have his son deliver our bags to the house. Signar just looked at me, as I picked up the sapling and headed to speak to Danica. I needed to think, but I was so confused. I turned back around and walked up to him, stopping only when the sapling made it impossible to get any closer.  I shifted the plant to my hip and put my hand on his cheek, then inched it behind his head,  drawing his face down to mine. I kissed his lips softly, saying " I had not forgotten that we need to talk about us. I... there is something, something .. I have this pressure in my head saying that a storm is coming, but it's not the weather. I need you with me, I can't tackle this by myself. But there is something else, something I know, but it's like standing too close to a tree and not being able to see the forest around me."

He looked at me and kissed me back, taking the sapling from me, and said. " As long I can stay by your side, I am happy to let things be for a short time. Just do not say or do anything that you don't mean. " he leaned back down and put his lips to my ear. "You have my heart in your hands, My Lady, have care of it." With that, he strode up to the gate. I stood there stunned for a moment and then wondered why cause it wasn't like he had been overly subtle about his feelings. I guess hearing the words, was different than just presuming.

Danica thanked us nicely and went off to care for the new tree. I would inquire of her if she might ask the Lady Kynareth of a cure for my curse when she was less busy.  I also thought for a moment to go and speak with Farengar, but wizard though he was, he was not really old enough to have felt the ebb and wane of his magic over the course of years. What I really needed was a Dunmer or Altmer mage, either might know the answer to my problem, but I did not know any well enough to ask though.

Heading back to Breezehome I looked around for Tex and didn't see him. I looked over my shoulder at Signar and asked him had he seen the hound. He shook his head and said that Tex had run off across the tundra once we had turned on the road into Whiterun. I shrugged he would be back when he had his fill of chasing rabbits.

I had looked at my armor but it was complete toast, nothing was really salvageable. So I would need something more durable than simple leather if I were to continue fighting dragons.  I had some old armor that I might be able to work into something stronger, but I really didn't have the strength to smith, something like what I really needed.  A set of leathers and a  steel plate cuirass, that I might be able to combine into an armor that would work for my style.

I worked on my armor and watched for Tex to come back over the next few days. I had a new bedmate, though Signar did nothing more than hold me. I was thankful for that, but even I started to want more but knew that it would be unfair until such a time as I could come to a decision about our relationship. Too many things were flitting through my mind, too many problems with no answers.

Then I woke in the middle of the night and at least one of my questions was answered. It didn't really matter, what would happen, the here and now is what really mattered. I had really been very obtuse, not thinking, I had a man that genuinely loved me and my feelings for him were just as strong.  He was right, any pain that might be felt in the future was not worth not having good memories now.

I stood up and went to the small jewelry box that sat on the night table, most were trinkets and other things that I kept for presents to friends... an old habit. But I felt around for the distinct filigree work on one of the necklaces. When I found it, I put it on and then lit a couple candles with a small magic spell, took off my gown, and then crawled back onto the bed, sitting with my lower legs under me. I leaned forward and put my lips next to Signar's ear.  I ran my fingernail right down the middle of his spine and blew softly in his ear at the same time. It had the desired effect, only more so, I was again flat on my back, with his chest crushing my breasts.  He must have caught a glint of gold in the candlelight because he leaned back and picked up the necklace and then dropped it back on my chest with a wide smile... no words were necessary or used the rest of the night.

~~~~~~~~~
The black hound lay in the dappled sunlight near the Shrine, he had an air as if waiting,  had already been there for a day. When a man in antiquated armor walked out of the deepest shadows, he stood. The man glanced around then his gaze settled on the place the hound had been and a huge man with a battle-scared body stood instead.

"So what are our chances? "  The huge man rubbed a scar on his chest, and rolled his wide shoulders, getting a distant look on his face.

"Better than even now, she is making better choices, plus she has found something to live for." The other man looked sharply at him.

"That was in doubt? "

"The human mind is a frail thing, some of her sisters gave up, she was close.  Having her come back again and again and placing her head on a chopping block might not be the best way to keep her sane. She has thought more than once of volunteering for the block first."

"Would she do that now, you said she has something to live for."

"No, I think not. She has a high sense of duty. As long as there are people she thinks are dependent on her, she will do the job we push her towards."

The armor-clad man looked towards Whiterun,  "So much on so frail a woman"

"It's not the first time and the last she had no help". He rubbed the scar on his neck and indicated himself and others.

"That's a rather ironic form you chose".

The huge man snorted and then laughed. " Do they not call me your guard dog?".

"Among other things, yes. " With that, he turned and walked into the deepest shadows and was no longer there.  Crystal blue eyes had watched him depart, then turned to lope back to Whiterun,  catching a rabbit along the way. It was, after all, expected.

A Missing Piece pg 14

I awoke the next morning with something pushing on my back and the distinct panting snore that belonged to Tex. I heaved a sigh and rolled onto my stomach burring my head under the pillow. I was completely shocked to hear a deep male voice tell me to get my tail outa bed, breakfast was ready. I pulled my head out from under the pillow and looked at Tex, his crystal blue eyes were open and his tail was thumping the bed.

"What did you say?" It came out just a little bit squeakier than I would have liked.

" I said get your tail out of bed.. of course, I was referring to the dog", came Signar's voice from behind me and I rolled back over to look in his direction.  "But since your up, you might as well come down and have breakfast as well." He walked out of the bathing room and headed across my bedroom to the door. All I could think of was.. Holy mother of Mara,  as ten acres of bronzed muscle that was barely covered by the towel draped around his middle, disappeared through my doorway.

I felt the bed shake and looked down at Tex, he was making the oddest sounds, if one didn't know better you would think he was laughing. "What do you think is so funny?" He whined and licked me on the side of the face again. "Ick... ok so the look on my face probably was funny, " I put my head down on his and ruffled his hair, " Don't tell him ok?" Tex snorted and I grimace and then said, "Yeah your probably right, he probably saw the silly look on my face."

I got up and went into the bathing room and washed the sleep out of my face. I looked at my reflection in the silvered mirror and laughed to myself, I was dammed either way. I stood there with my eyes closed for a moment and heard the sounds of Whiterun outside the balcony door. The children's laughter tore a hole in my heart but also gave me a new resolve. I could not knowingly abandon a family and with this damn curse, I might not have a choice, death being the equalizer. Their had to be some way of curing it or getting rid of it, perhaps the favor of one divine would override the curse of another.

At that moment, I knew what we would do next. Danica had said she needed a special knife to get some sap to help the tree here to grow again, so perhaps Kynareth would answer a question in return for such a favor. With that resolve in mind, I got dressed and went down to breakfast and let Singar and Tex know what our plans were, if not why.

I ate a very hearty breakfast and then gathered some items up that I knew I could sell so that we could buy our travel rations. With Riverwood along the way, we could stay there on our way to the Orphan Rock place that Danica had described and head to Iverstead from there.  I gave the Items to Signar and told him to go to the general store, as Belethor would still not speak to me. I headed up to Dragonsreach and talked to the court wizard.

We talked a minute or so on dragons and I gave him my notes. I traded out some of the magical items that we had found in the barrow, buying some soul gems to recharge my staff with. I explained a couple thing's as he skimmed my notes, but told him I would be back in a few days, as I had things to do.

We left Whiterun mid-morning and made it to Riverwood before dark. I got us a room at the Inn and was speaking to Ognar when Signar walked in with Faendal. I walked over and gave him a hug and kiss on the cheek. When I asked Faendal what's new's, he had much to tell.

It seemed Camilla had agreed to marry him as soon as he completed the house on his homestead. Oh, she would help him build it, as much as she could and start a garden and of course decorate it to her liking. I almost choked on the last part, but I kept a straight face. We chatted well into the night, Signar relaxing more and more as the evening wore on.

Signar put his tankard down and suggested that we get some sleep if I wanted to make an early start of it. I smiled and said fine and watched as he walked to his room. As I took the last sip of my mead, Faendal gave me an odd look and said, " You know you'd be much warmer of a night if you curled up in that Nord's bed and I'm sure he wouldn't object".

I choked on my mead as it went down the wrong way. When I could finally breathe again without coughing, I told him that Tex kept me warm enough. I looked around for the big hound and didn't see him, shrugging I told Faendal good night.  I figured Tex was off chasing rabbits again and I would have a foot warmer by morning.

I was wrong though, It wasn't until we were back in Whiterun that I saw Tex again, I missed his warmth at night. Other than the Hargraven at Orphan's Rock, the trip was very uneventful. I gave the Horn to the Greybeards and they gave me a small ceremony to formally say I was Dragonborn.  I'm not sure if it really mattered in the long run, having open access to High Hrothgar was very nice, but it wasn't like I could stay there the rest of my life.

I did appreciate that I could come and go as I pleased and they would give advice as I asked, but all of it would be slanted towards a peaceful solution, which was nice, but not always the best way. Danica thanked me, but then asked if I wouldn't go get the sap myself as she didn't wish to touch such a profane weapon. I understood that completely and said we would. I had not planned on going right away, but a pilgrim asked if he could travel with us and as he looked the type that could barely defend himself, I figured a trip straight there would be best. I did tell him if we ran into any dragons to run... hide, we would take care of it.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
With the passing of the last blizzard, I sat outside and enjoyed my lunch in the cold crisp air. It would be a day or so before I had to worry overmuch about my fellow assassins getting up here. Any that had been caught out would be dead and it was a day or so from the nearest towns. I heard an unfamiliar roar and looked out over the pond towards the mountains and saw a large shape flying at an angle towards me.

As it got closer and closer, I realized just how massive the beast was. As it angled to the left I got a very good view of it's underbelly and talons, as it spit fire at something in the distance, I had a new appreciation for the woman that was fighting these beasts.

A Turn of Events pg 13

The morning was foggy and chill, I wanted to be out of the swamp as quickly as possible before it decided to snow or worse spit ice. We followed a game path out and eventually found the trail into Morthal. I pulled the saddle bag's out of my pack and placed them on my horse, taking the pack itself into the Inn with us, Signar did the same with his pack.

I had a berry tart for breakfast, Signar had a much heartier breakfast with sausage, eggs, toasted bread, and some mead. Tex had what looked like a very thick stew, it had been pretty funny when the barmaid had asked what we wanted and then started to leave, Tex had made a growl-bark sound and Signar had told her that Tex wanted something also. Funnier still after she brought our food and went to leave he stopped her by walking in front and nudging her till she was forced to put out her hand like she was going to pet him.... and he dropped a gold coin into said hand. Signar laughed and said, "Breakfast is on him".

Sometimes I wondered if that dog wasn't more human than some people I knew. I ate my tart with an appreciation for the heat of the berries in the middle and watched as Signar plowed through his food as if he had not eaten in a week. As I finished the last bite of my dinner a woman in a low-cut dress came over and started chatting Signar up, because of the way she was standing he was staring straight at her two best assets. His cheeks went red and he looked back down at his food. I shook my head, but as she leaned over to whisper in his ear, I had had enough and spoke up.

"Lady, I beg you to keep those fangs to yourself or we might have to face each other at noon with our favorite weapons." She looked and me, and I stared back, with raised eyebrows. I knew what she was and I was letting her know I knew. Tex was standing behind her with his hackles up and growling low in his throat. How the people of this town didn't see what she is, was beyond me, but each to their own.

 I got up and went to get the food that the Inn Keeper had promised me, putting it in both of our packs. The woman winked and said that there were a couple of frozen venison steaks,  potatoes, and tarts in the packs. They would last at least until tonight and if we were headed to higher regions maybe longer. I thanked her and went out to saddle the horses, Tex followed along with me, but I paused to tell Signar to take his time with breakfast, it would be a few days before we would get to Rorikstead and at least a day after that to Whiterun.

As we neared the Whiterun stables a courier came up and handed me a letter from the Jarl of Falkreath Hold. I gave the man a few gold and said thank you, then put the letter in my pack. As I started to unsaddle my horse, Tex flopped down and whined, I looked down into those big blue eyes and told him if he wanted to go see Hulda and get a bowl of her stew to go ahead, it wasn't like he would help unsaddle the horses or carry gear to the house. He jumped up and ran a few steps then came back and reared up on his hind leg's almost knocking me down and licked the side of my face once and then bolted. I shook my head as I watched him go.

Signar was laughing so I asked him if he wanted to give me a hug, a lick, and then run. That got the stable man laughing. Signar just paused in the grooming of his horse and looked over her back at me. I blinked at the intense stare he gave me and went beat red when he said.

"My Lady if I wanted to hug and lick you, I would not be running away after:", To which the stable man fell out of his chair laughing. I balled up the cloth I was using and threw it at him, it landed on top of his blond head. He just pulled it off and kept rubbing his horse down.

 When we ended up on the same side, between the horses, he caught me by the shoulder and leaned down... "My Lady, I but tease, I know you do not look upon me in such a way."  I looked at our feet and heaved a huge sigh. I looked back up and saw the concern on his face.

"No, Signar, I think of you as a good friend, not just my housecarl. I do not know that I want my heart entangled with another, so long as this curse is on me. Martin was bad enough and I only lost him once, though I have a lifetime of memories from each of my resurrections. It is bad enough when I begin to care for someone only to lose them again and again until I give up our friendship and make events happen in a different way. I remember that friendship, but they have no knowledge of the depth it goes to."

He nodded and said he understood, I wondered though. It had been a long time since his wife died, but I could not and would not let those types of thoughts interfere with our friendship, it was too rare that I had anyone that I could count on.

When we reached the house, the guard that was assigned handed me a stack of towels and said that as soon as he had seen the black hound dart past, he had started filling the bath with hot water. I thanked him calmly and politely, even though I wanted to squeal and give him a great big hug... a hot bath...hot!! I hurried upstairs to my bath and soaked until the water turned cool. I crawled into bed and slept the clock around.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I was walking back from the baths when my door opened before I touched the handle, the Lady of the house was standing there,  she beckoned me inside. When my eye's adjusted to the dimmer light of the bedroom, I saw that she and her daughters were standing there in gowns so sheer they might as well not have been wearing them. She walked up to me and started unbuttoning my shirt, "Your master will be home tomorrow, we wish to have some fun tonight" I knew the kind of fun they wanted, I had avoided them as much as possible, but it wasn't always possible. Well all three of them at once, this would piss the master off if he knew. And really isn't that what my life had come down to, pissing him off without going so far that he would have his favored assassin killed... punished, oh yes, I had the whip scar's to prove that he would punish.

 I was laying at my ease, after having satisfied all three of the ladies..two of them curled one on either side, with their mother half draped over my thighs, when I heard the heavy click of The Master's footsteps. I did not even bother to move, other than to place my hand's on the headboard behind me. As he stepped into the room two men went around him one on either side.

He bellowed in rage and all three of the ladies jerked awake and screamed, it is not like they could yell rape when they were in my room. He yelled for them to leave and slapped his wife as she passed him. Me he threatened to kill, telling the men to take me to the courtyard.

As they neared, took a step closer to the bed, I pulled two daggers from the sheaths behind the headboard and threw one at each man. They both hit the floor as the slow-acting paralytic poison took effect. The master yelled and drew his sword and I came off the bed with the sword I drew from the scabbard that was hanging on the bedpost.

It was not a fair fight, I was young and the best assassin that he had ever trained, he was old and had slowed much more than he thought. As I held my sword against his throat, I told him that all he had ever had to do was treat me with respect and kindness and I probably would have been his dog until death. Inch by inch, I pressed the blade into his throat until the main artery was severed and pumping his lifeblood out.

I turned around and quickly got dressed, as I was sure that the ladies had hysterically told the guards some false story about what was happening. That night those three ladies and I were the only things left alive in the villa. I had almost forgotten my name, almost, but I said it out loud now..."Nelthas Dareathys, I am Nelthas Dareathys, I am no longer the Crimson Raven, I am my own man." I knew at that time that I would not be able to quit being an assassin, but I would only take those jobs that I wanted to take.

I awoke with a start, covered in sweat, with the smell of blood strong in my nose. I had not thought of those days in a very long time. Was I still that cold-blooded assassin that rarely ever thought beyond pleasing his Master? That is until his Master got crueler and crueler as he got older and slower.

Ustengrav pg 12

 

 We fought our way in and fought our way down into the depths of the barrow. Signar and Tex seemed to be making up for a day of rest by practically running from room to room, leaving me behind to check to make sure the Horn wasn't in one of those rooms. I really didn't think it would be, it should be in the central tomb, but one never knows.

  At one point all three of us stopped and stared out and down into the cavern, which seemed to go on to an unknown depth. We could see a pool and mist caused by a  waterfall that was barely a humm to our ears. The two of them were off like a shot, like two small children racing each other to the top of the hill. I hurried after them again but refused to run.

As we descended lower still, I started hearing a whispering chant, it sounded much like the one that I had heard in Bleakfalls, so perhaps another of the word walls? I rounded a corner and almost ran into the two of them as they stood there looking down into the cavern that we had seen earlier from above. I saw a bit of movement but my eyes would not completely focus on it in the dark.

Tex took off and I cast a light spell to the middle of the cavern or at least what I thought was the middle. My eyes adjusted just as Tex leap onto a Skeleton, to which Signar asked " What's a dog without a bone?" Then he to took off down the ramp. I made my way in a more leisurely fashion. From slightly higher than the cave bottom, I drew my bow and made to practice on the skeletons, they were an easy moving target and I really did need some practice.

When I started forward both Tex and Signar were headed back up another ramp, until I whistled and got their attention. I pointed in the direction, of the sound of the chanting and waterfall. They came back down and Signar followed me to the word wall. I felt the knowledge fill me and knew I would be able to use this Thu'um.

We explored this area and found only one more draugr behind the waterfall, I took the opportunity and washed the dust, sweat, and bone dust off of my face. I knew I might end up with more or I might have just bathed in the pool.

We headed back to the ramp and at the top found a puzzle lock, once we figured it out, it was a piece of cake. From there on out we only ran into some spiders, before we found the main Tomb and retrieved the Horn.

We went out by a set of trick doors, we could plainly see them to go out, but on turning around, once they closed, you could not see the door at all. As we exited we heard the familiar roar of a dragon and the scream of angry horses. As we topped the steps out of the barrow, Tex darted past me and Signar was on my heels.  I moved to the side, looking at the scene.

One of the horses was down, it looked to be the beautiful black dappled stallion. He was breathing still but it was labored, so I used my staff and summoned a Lesser Deadra and then hurried to the Herd Stallion and used a healing spell on him. After he was on his feet, he and his mares dispersed into the swamp. I looked around and found the dragon fighting a Chaurus, Tex was keeping his distance as either was liable to turn on him. Signar was shooting arrows into it from a safe distance, so I started lobbing firebolts at it.

Once the dragon was flaming bit's, Tex and Signar turned on the much-weakened chaurus and tore it to pieces.  I used healing spells on both, as they had gotten some of the poison from dragon and chaurus on themselves.

Because I didn't really feel like tramping through the swamp at night, Signar took all the dead bodies off and Tex patrolled the area. I built up the fire and when Tex brought me a rabbit, I skinned and gutted it, then spitted it. I knew he would catch another, but if he didn't then we would share.

When they came back to the fire we discussed our next plan's. I needed to give the Horn to Arngeir, but also, we needed time to mend gear and stock up on travel rations again. We would have a good mid-morning breakfast in Morthal, before collecting the horses and heading to Whiterun.

A pleasant day pg 11

I cooked our breakfast and waited for Signar to wake up. I was sitting on my bedroll repairing a splitting seam when he woke up. He gave me a sleepy little smile and asked how I felt this morning. I told him my head wasn't as mussy this morning and I could think clearly. I still felt as if I storm was brewing, but now I could see past it.

I asked if he would like breakfast he just raised a brow and I said it was toasted bread with some snowberries, I had crushed into a kind of spread and some boiled eggs, though if he really wanted some, Tex had caught another rabbit. Signar grimaced and said no, he'd make do with what I had made, Tex could eat the rabbit. I laughed and toasted the bread while he went down to the river to wash his face.

When he came back he sat on his bedroll and watched me mend the seams in my armor. I looked up and saw the contemplative look on his face and said "Ask if I can answer I will".

"Why do you wear that necklace if they can track you by it?" He inquired curiously.

"Because it's not actually the necklace that they are tracking, it's blood. Family blood to be exact, we all wear the necklaces so that we can keep track of each other.", I sighed and went back to mending my armor, but continued to speak " Though I have not felt any of my sisters in a few reincarnations. Now I don't think I shall. The stone changed from blood red to blue, I am not sure why as it only does this when the wearer dies and I'm not dead, at the moment anyway."

He looked at me with a puzzled expression, " Do you have any idea why it would do that, you said 'not sure' not that you didn't know?"

I shook my head, "It's an idea and might even be a far-fetched one. I think it has to do with this "Dragonborn" business, I'm pretty sure I had none of the "dragon blood" in me when I saved Kvatch. The Amulet of Kings can only be worn by those with dragon blood, I could not wear it. I tried once, before crossing a deep river, I didn't wish to lose it, so I tried to put it on, but I could not."

I looked up at him and gave a wry smile, " If fighting all these dragons doesn't kill me, I just may not have to worry about assassins tracking me down on my next re-birth, they know what I look like in this time."

He paused with a piece of toast almost in his mouth and then dropped his hand down, with a very startled look on his face, " What a minute, what do you mean they know what you look like now? You don't look the same always?"

I gave a soft laugh, " No, I look a little different in every reincarnation. Some things stay the same, and some change. My eyes are usually blue or green, my hair blond and I am always petite. That they could change once in a while... Oh to be a 6 ft Nord Battle-maiden. I always have magic, though in various degrees. If you saw me in Kvatch, you would think I was my own granddaughter or some kind of cousin, with very similar looks.

He nodded and that seemed to be the end of his curiosity for the day. That night as we lay down trying to get some sleep with Tex a wet snoring mess in between us, he asked some questions about my family. I answered as best I could, explaining about the male cousins that raised me. I told some rather amusing stories of some of the fixes that ladies in my family had gotten themselves into trying to stay alive and sane.

The next morning dawned clear and bright, we packed up camp and headed for Usengrav to get the Horn for the Greybeards. We stopped in Morthal briefly, but they did not have a general goods store, so we made do with what we had. We made it to Ustengrav mid-morning, only to face bandits and necromancers before we even set one foot inside.

~~~~~~
For the second day in a row, I awoke not having had any dreams of the Lady, which meant I had a good night's sleep. I had a lot of thinking to do and some planning, but I knew I had time... I had all the time that I needed, she would come here, but it would not be in the very near future.

It's what friends are for pg 10

I awoke feeling antsy, my head was humming, my gut churning, something was coming. I had the same feelings when a powerful storm was heading my way. This was not foreboding, but nor was it an actual storm. I felt Tex's head on my legs and patted it, then sat up and swung my feet to the floor. I could smell bread cooking, but not the meat that the Innkeeper would have ready at breakfast, so it wasn't too close to daylight yet.

 Tex gave a whine and Signar rolled into a sitting position before he even opened his eyes. I gave him a second and then told him I wanted to leave within the hour. I washed my face in the basin and then got into my armor. I left the room before Signar was completely dressed and went out and ordered a simple breakfast. We ate in silence, though Signar kept looking at me, he would get some answers, but not today.

Soon as breakfast was eaten and the Inn Keeper handed me a packet of travel food we all went outside. I saddled my own horse and put my pack on her. I had told Signar that we would leave the horses in Whiterun and take the carriage to Morthal, then walk to the Barrow that the Greybeards Horn was in. But I changed my mind at that moment, we could leave the horses in Morthal.

I took a little-known pass over the mountain and came out closer to Whiterun than Signar had thought. It was harder on the Horses and I got off and walked the last bit up to the stables. I asked the stableman to feed both horses and rub them down, but to re-saddle them, as we would be leaving.

I took my saddlebag's off and headed to the market across from the stable instead of the one inside the town, there was less choice, but that was fine. We had lunch at the small tavern next to the stables and then we were off. I had a camping spot picked out from memory, it was a good area that hunters had used in the past. It proved to be a good place to stop for the night, as the hunter was there and didn't mind if we put out bedrolls under the overhang with his.

I awoke the next morning with the same feeling of an impending storm, my restlessness transferred to Alaris, who pranced and sidled, instead of walking in a straight line. I did not scold her as I knew my emotional state had transferred to her. I let her travel at the speed she wished, which seemed to be a ground-eating canter, though I slowed her and got off and walked now and then.

I took us through another mountain pass, this one lower, and found a river valley where I intended to stop for a day or so in. It was a defensible area, but I didn't really think it would be needed. Whatever was coming was not close and I needed to deal with the emotions that threatened to get out of hand.

 I stopped in a spot that was near a grove of trees and the river, but not too close to either one, and asked Signar to set up our tent. I asked Tex to come with me to gather some wood. When I got back to camp it was all set up, with a small fire that we could add more wood to later.

I paced or stalked around camp.. I could not sit, I could not stand still... I felt like screaming and yet all I sought was some peace and quiet. Signar watched me with a too-blank expression on his face, so I knew there were some thoughts behind his bright blue eyes. I walked away from camp and then quickly back and stopped right in front of him.

"I don't know where to start, so, I will start at the very beginning. I will answer any question I can, but please let me get it all out first" I proceeded to tell him my family history, about the assassins and why, I closed my eyes and took a deep breath before I started in on the Blood Curse ... It was deep into the night before I finished with a sketchy outline of my personal history, much of it left out because I felt he would ask anything he wished to know the details of.

When I finished speaking he was looking down at his large calloused hands, with a contemplative look on his face. I had finally sat down on a stump near the fire, but I still had a restless urge to get up and run. When he finally looked up, it was with a sad look in his eyes.

"How old, no, how long have you been doing this?" His face and voice were neutral and I was glad of that.

" I do not remember the exact year of my birth, but I do know it was before the Dragon Wars. Dragons did not fly freely in my youth, though there were some around." I sighed deeply and thought for a minute, " I was one of Harald's advisers, though he had many friends that got more recognition, you see that is the way it has mostly been. I have always been in the background, never the focus of historical events. "

He looked back down at his hands and then rolled his shoulders as he looked back up at me. " You are the Hero of Kvatch." It was a statement not a question, but I nodded yes anyway, then looked down and away. I heard the creak and jingle of his armor as he stood up and walked over to me, then knelt close enough to turn my face with a careful finger, so that I was looking at him again.

 " You loved him." again it was a statement and not a question, but I nodded and I felt my eyes tear up. I looked up at him through tear-blurred eyes, the grief I had hidden before must have been plain on my face.

"You have never had a chance to grieve, just thrust into another world-changing event", his voice was low and was as much to himself as to me. He shifted again so that he was sitting next to me. " I can not imagine, how you must feel, I lost my wife and it nearly destroyed me, but I had friends and family around to help." His arm around me was a warm comfort that I had not even known I really wanted, as I turned my face into his chest and felt his other arm around my back. I had the very irrelevant thought about being glad he was wearing his travel leathers and not his normal plate steel armor.

I felt the tears leaking down my face and then sobs choked me as they escaped. I do not know how long I cried on Signar's shoulder, but I do remember being surrounded by his warmth and feeling a cold tongue lick my arm. I cried myself to sleep, something I had never done in all my time.

I woke the next morning with a blinding headache, my nose stopped up and my eyes were all itchy. The feeling of a storm approaching had not faded, but I felt my mind more at rest. I turned my head and looked at Signar, he was still snoring lightly, so I  got up quietly and walked down to the river. Stripping off my clothes I jumped in the ice-cold water, I yelped and raced right back out. There sitting on the bank with his tongue lolling out and laughter in his eyes was Tex, towel at his feet. I grabbed the towel and started drying off, telling Tex that had he been a really good friend he would have made me a cup of hot soup or mead or something.  He barked softly at me and then got up to wander back to the fire.

  I wrapped the damp towel around me and walked back into the tent and grabbed my hunting leathers, my armor would need repair and some cleaning.  As I got dressed I thought back to the night before and realized I had not really told Signar too many personal details, but he had figured some things out on his own. We could talk more today and I would try not to break down and cry like a baby again. Tomorrow we would set out to retrieve the Horn.

~~~~~
The long trip back to the Nightgate Inn was plenty of time to think about what I needed to do. It was coming down to Her life or mine, I much preferred my life over hers. I needed the bounty to disappear, to make it so that I would never have to work again.  I was not lazy, just tired of killing. One last life, one last death on my conscience, or what passed for one.